Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow!!!

Shampoo = Rs. 150/month
Conditioner = Rs. 200/month
Hair gel = Rs. 59/month
Hair oil = Rs. 19/month
Time spent on grooming = 45 min daily average

No this is not the expense list of my sister or GF, but believe it or not, it is mine. All the pains I take to have that rock star look ( at least I think so )… phew… But then it gets on your nerves more often than not. Having hair about 15cm long and maintaining/managing them is not everyone’s cuppa tea. I really appreciate how many women around me manage to handle things very well, even with those long locks all around their face. Take me for example, one fine day I was taking the stairs and my horribly thick hair growth obscured my vision and I almost tripped.

There are many experiences which made me wonder if it was really time to get that much awaited trim. And as if the gods were enjoying my plight, every little neonate I knew had a nag for pulling my hair. I actually avoided going near kids for the last 20 days fearing that one of them might actually be strong enough to pull em off my scalp. And all this when I was posted in the pediatrics department during my internship rotations. Needless to say, it was a herculean task to give them injections while keeping them from crying at high pitch directly into my ears or pulling my hair just to get back at me.

Hair today, gone tomorrow

Having long hair have some other con’s too - For eg: I had developed this tic of shaking my head sideways (just like the babes in bay watch do, but only in a hideous manner) and sometimes I overdid it to an extent that my neck hurt the whole day.

Que: Why do women’s ears weigh more than men’s ?

Ans: They bear the weight of thier hair for decades and results in hypertrophy of tissue.

My ears had to face similar brunt for the past 3 months and every time I looked into the mirror, I double checked if they were still in place or fell off due to the weight. Apparently my ears are stronger than I expect, cause they were still in place. I intend to test their limits by pulling a semi-trailer with them next week. So if you guys don’t hear from me next week; assume that I am in the reconstruction surgery ward getting an ear job done (I would prefer hard cash rather than “get well soon” cards).

The situation grew worse over the last 2-3 weeks with my USMLE exams coming near and i noticed that I spent more than an hour on keeping the hair in place. This included hair wash, conditioning, combing and choosing a matching bandanna, etc.. So I finally decided to call it a day and decided to get a “trim” and while I am at it, go to a good saloon and get a good style too. So I went on a quest for the perfect saloon and lemme tell you, there ain’t no such thing for us unfortunate males. All the places were either too costly (offering a hair cut for 500 bucks, for CRYING OUT LOUD - I could survive for 10 days with that amount of money) or the hair stylist appeared gay ( I have no grudge again gay ppl but I am not comfortable with someone touching me at all the wrong places - just keep your hands above the neck line)

I finally settled for a cut at “Belliza” an all-sex saloon. The title is actually misleading as there was not a single person having sex in the saloon when I entered. What a let down…. They charged me 100 bucks for a hair cut (which I later realized was no different from my local barber and he only charged 20 bucks).

I hair trim actually paid off during my exams when I finished off with 10 minutes to spare. I am pretty sure that if I had appeared with the long locks, most probably I would have wasted 10-15 minutes in my efforts to keep em coming in front of my eyes. Not to mention the fact that the guys at prometric would not have recognized me when comparing the photo in my passport and might not allow me to take the exam.

But 2 weeks into the hair trim I have many more advantages of short hair to share:

spending 100 bucks on a hair trim is expensive, but compare it to the savings I make on shampoo, conditioner, oil and gel. I usually have to rush to the super mart every month to buy me new supplies but this time, I’m two weeks into the new stock and only 1/10th of the products have been consumed. That amounts to savings of 200/month… that is something, I’m sure you’ll agree with me, Kewl. Taking a bath was the most time consuming activity previously but lately I receive compliments from my parents for making out of the shower soo quickly. The hair itself weighted at least 200-300 grams and my head definitely lighter in the post trim period. And the best part is that after waking up from bed, I don’t have to make a beeline to the mirror to check if the hair is in place.

To cut the story short, I think long hair look good on women (who i believe were genetically given the power of excellent hair management) or rock stars. For most men like me, small hair rules… They are easy to manage, saves money and precious time. Go get that trim today… and if you dont like it Ghar Ki Kheti hai, phir badh jayenge